Yet an other piece of the puzzle…

Yet an other piece of the puzzle…
ana™ / Foter / CC BY-NC-ND

Almost a month has passed since I last wrote… The house has been full of children, grandchildren and friends and it has been a time of joy, but also a period of transformation. This period, which I think took off after the last blog post, is by no means over, I’m probably more in the middle of it, or we are, I must say – for all that’s happening now is all about me and Carl-Arne and our life’s purposes. It is as if everything that has been unsolved emotionally and what we still have left to learn and get rid off in order to do and accomplish what we are supposed to do, have entered “warp-speed”. There is probably not a day that passes without us becoming aware of both this and that that are related to our learning and our emotions. It’s exciting, but extremely tough mentally, when one in just one day can oscillate between both hope and hopelessness… One second one trust that everything will be all that we know and hope for, and the next only to be replaced with skepticism and “it will never work”…

The afternoon-evening yesterday was horrible. I felt ready to throw in the towel and stop fighting for something I really don’t know what it is – you just think a lot of… But the desire to be able to accomplish all that is in front of us is too strong, so when I went to bed, I asked for guidance during the night to ascertain all that is happening right now, and more importantly, why. When I went down to get my morning coffee my thoughts came in a furious pace and suddenly the world became bright again. I understand now and as a letter in the mail back came the inspiration to continue and to take hold of all the projects that has been put on hold for almost a month. What a relief it is when you feel that the light is back!

 

So, back to the story that now continues.

A month after that fateful phone call, it was decided that I and one of my partners would end our cooperation as it no longer worked. The project, which was still in its infancy and full of potential, was taken over by a third party and I sent him all our records. It was with a light spirit and a huge sigh that I handed over the ship and hence the negotiations with my former partner. But I think I’d sighed a little early…

After a few days he called me and asked,

“What have you done with the advertising tax?”

“What, advertising tax? ‘I said. “It’s been removed …”

“No, it hasn’t,” he replied.

“But it has” I said, “after what I found out the advertising tax was taken away at the end of 1998 and we printed our first issue in 1999. It was the printer that informed me about the change… “.

“Oops. Then I understand, “he said. “Pia, that’s right, but also wrong. The advertising tax on ads was made up of two parts, one that traded on the ad itself and one that traded on the printed matter. Both called, carelessly, for advertising tax. It was on the printed matter that the “advertising tax” was removed – not the ads… “

Slowly I realized what it was he was telling me. Not only was the breakup with my partner mentally difficult, now I also realized that I owed the state a large amount of money. Money that hadn’t been charged and that didn’t exist…

If the truth is to be told, and off course it is, I have to admit that I had my doubts about that the advertising tax were truly gone, but I chose not to look further into the subject and relied on that the printer knew what he was saying And they did – the advertising tax was gone – for their part…

Not to examine all the facts when one as I “knew” that it might not be correct is usually fatal, but even if one examines “everything” and even have a dialogue with experts in the field so as not to miss any single little detail can go wrong. It would prove to be so too, but in a different field.

Of course I was upset by the information on the advertising tax which I got, but yet I didn’t feel beaten to the ground. Many were there who advised me to pretend as if everything was in order and not to inform the tax authorities about my mistake, but I was of a different opinion. There was so much money involved that it would be seen as a serious tax fraud if it came to light and the sentence of it could be jail for up to 10 years after what I understood. I wasn’t willing to take that risk, so I simply called the tax office and told them about my mistake. Naive as I was, I thought that they would help me with a payment plan since the tax itself never had been charged, and that I therefore had to pay out of my own pocket… After many letters and long conversations, I finally got a notification that I wasn’t going to get any respite or payment plan. The only possibility for postponement was if I was on my deathbed… In other words, within half a year, I would have to pay the entire debt, plus interest and other charges. A huge amount for me.

I knew I would not be able to solve it and that I almost certainly was looking forward to a personal bankruptcy. Something I didn’t even want to think about. As soon as I thought of it, it was as if the earth disappeared under my feet and my stomach turned inside out. Somehow I made my way through the next few weeks, trying to find different solutions. Maybe it was the search for a possible solution that kept me going… I do not know. What I do know now though, is that if I had known what was still waiting around the corner, I had probably gone insane…

Kommentera

E-postadressen publiceras inte. Obligatoriska fält är märkta *